A site dedicated to the rational study of the UMMO affair
D41-4 Steam bath - breakfast - INOWII fruit
Daily Life on UMMO-4 [ VCEU-4 ]
Language SPANISH
No. of Copies 1
A. Fernando Sesma Manzano
MADRID SPAIN
Our steam bath is a genuine score in which the harmonic richness of musical notes has been replaced by olfactory stimuli. This simile, however, should not lead you to believe that our everyday aromatic mixtures enjoy an exquisiteness similar to the marvellous symphony concerts of earthlings.
Only on exceptional occasions, and at popular gatherings comparable to those organized on the Planet Earth for your sports competitions, are genuine IAIKEAIUUXAA (Spectacular perfume mixtures) staged on UMMO, in which the aromatic nuances follow one another in an intoxicating style, keeping to the most rigorous aesthetic norms.
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It is now 218 uiw for the family in our story: The GEE (HUSBAND) will not be able to go on enjoying the aromatic delights of the bath. Today he has been assigned the culinary function which, although not unpleasant, requires a series of attentions and care.
He soon leaves the EXAABII (Washroom) while his YIE (WIFE), parents and little son fervently wish him luck in his task, and they continue to take their ease, immersed in the caressing perfumed mist that saturates the spacious room.
The adjoining room can now serve as UAMIIXAABII (DINING ROOM AND KITCHEN INDISCRIMINATELY).
Some soft inaudible whistles (At about 30,000 cycles per second) (ULTRASONIC), emitted artificially by the throat, make some special appliances emerge from the floor (where before only sepia- and mauve-coloured rectangles appeared), which constitute what we call UAMIIXXANMOO (AUTOMATIC KITCHENS PROGRAMMED WITH TITANIUM MEMORY).
On UMMO, our Planet, family rotation in the assignment of certain household tasks has been prescribed for many thousands of XEE (ONE XEE = one year of UMMO). Even the UUGEE or UUYIE (CHILDREN), on reaching approximately eight years of age (EARTH years), are incorporated into the household chores and given a responsibility. Their parents, moved, even put up with the understandable shortcomings of their first faltering attempts, whether in trying the mixtures for the bath or in selecting the visual images of the UULODAXAABI (HEMISPHERICAL ROOM FOR VIEWING DISTANT IMAGES). The children thus become aware of their responsibility and importance within the family group. Their parents never laugh at them or show ill-contained impatience at the naive, involuntary mistakes of their clumsy little hands. On the contrary, the YIE corrects them patiently and lovingly, suggesting to them with words and visual images the disturbances that a trifling distraction or an imprudent mistake can cause to the whole group and to the brothers of UMMO.
But today it is the Father who must complete his turn at the culinary work. Undoubtedly there remain questions you may put to us to explain the process of these tasks. For example.
How does the housewife do her shopping? Where does she store it? How does she carry it? But these elementary questions in reality presuppose mental schemes previously stereotyped by you, in formulating them, with the customs of the Planet EARTH. Indeed, neither does the YIE (WIFE) of UMMO do her shopping in a food market, nor can the verb to buy be used correctly in our case, nor does she in reality need to carry food and other substances in common use personally. It would of course be very difficult for a hypothetical earthly visitor to our world to find one of our sisters pulling, for example, a little trolley with the bag of vegetables and greasy paper parcels.
And it is not that our YIE comfortably refuse to do this thankless work, playing the part of great earthly ladies. Precisely, the woman, like the GEE, does daily sports exercises that are much more active during the hours of play. No; it is simply that our social organization differs from yours in its customs and through the aids of mechanization.
You, Sesma Manzano, can see in the photocopied image we sent you earlier (IMAGE 1) a series of cylindrical tubes oriented vertically and buried in the ground surrounding the bore of the ANAUANAA (AXIAL COLUMN OF THE XAABI or DWELLING). Well then: These tubes of identical calibre (THIS CALIBRE IS UNIVERSAL ON UMMO, AS THE GAUGE OF EARTHLY RAILWAY TRACKS MAY BE), called NUUYAA, constitute a veritable store whose function is to preserve the products of habitual consumption by the family (FOODS, CHEMICAL PRODUCTS, LIQUEFIED GASES, PERFUMES etc.).
We shall explain this by means of an example.
Our Natural, semi-processed or artificial foods are usually produced in industrial plants and underground cultivation galleries many KOAE away (1 KOAE = 8.7 kilometres), being preserved in cylinders of equal diameter. Thus the juicy INOWII (IMAGE 8), a Fruit with yellow pulp and a very rough brown skin, are first treated by neutron bombardment to eliminate all the saprophytic germs that might cause their later putrefaction. A fruit so prepared keeps all its aroma, flavour and other qualities even without being kept in a refrigerated medium, and can last many months without spoiling.
But to prevent their dehydration (that is, drying out), the INOWII are packed with a gelatinous substance (A CHLORINATED COMPOUND OF SILICON), giving the whole the shape of a cylinder. The fruits are left wrapped in this viscous, pinkish, semi-transparent substance. The outer crust hardens rapidly on contact with nitrogen, so that the whole would remind you of a jar of fruit in syrup. Only in our case there is no glass container, and the jelly is not edible but a protective product which, incidentally, must not be exposed to the air.
Fats, meats, vegetables, glucose (SUGAR) are also prepared in the form of cylinders of exact dimensions (STANDARDIZED FOR ALL OF UMMO), in a way similar to the way you preserve food in containers of tinned iron sheet (TINPLATE).
Likewise, other non-food products of typical consumption in the homes of our Planet, such as ACIDS, LIQUID PROPANE, SILICONE POLYMERS, CICORNIUM OXIDE, GERMANIUM COMPOUNDS, are pressed into cylinders (IF THEY ARE POWDERS OR SOLIDS) or packed, if they are liquids, in cylindrical containers.
On UMMO there are distribution centres linked by means of a vast NETWORK of NUUDAIAA pipes or underground conduits to all the XAABII (DWELLINGS) of the district.
These products (FOOD OR NOT) are conveyed in the form of NUUGII cylinders through the said conduits in a way similar to the pneumatic tubes of Earth. The difference lies in the fact that these NUUDAIAA do not use air under pressure, as in your systems, but HELIUM (An inert gas), for the simple reason that the oxygen of the air chemically attacks the gelatinous substance enveloping a large part of the NUUGII (TRAVELLING CONTAINERS).
The occupants of the Dwelling have a good supply of consumer products, renewed automatically, stored in the NUUYA tubes and arriving periodically through the pneumatic conduits from the supply centres. Something like what a stock of tinned food would be among you.
What happens, then, if at a given moment the inhabitants decide to eat the sweet INOWII fruits? The process is somewhat complex, but in practice it takes less than a tenth of a UIW.
A crown selector (NOT DRAWN IN IMAGE 1 THAT WE SENT YOU) automatically selects, by means of a turn, the NUGII cylinder containing the fruit. This is conveyed through the inside of the ANAUANAA (AXIS OF THE DWELLING) to the room where the fruit is requested. But before coming out it has to pass through an auxiliary unit consisting of a chamber where the NUUGII (GELATINE PRESERVING CYLINDER) is subjected to the action of liquid OXYGEN. This strongly attacks the protective gelatinous substance, dissolving it. The residues (of silicon oxide and polychlorides) are removed. The process must be carried out rapidly to prevent the low temperature of the liquid oxygen (165 earth degrees centigrade below zero) from destroying the cell tissues of the fruit.
(U-C Note: In black and white, the INOWII drawing from the Aguirre compilation)
The INOWII is now freed of its protective layer and ready to be eaten (If our brother does not wish to chew the fruit (which has come out of the process too cold), it passes through an induction cylinder that raises its temperature slightly in an instant. The juicy INOWII is once more in our hands, fresh and tart, as tasty and aromatic as when it was picked from its shrub planted in the great underground galleries where artificial cultivation allows many harvests a year.
We leave our brother operating his UMMIXANMOO. This appliance, a more detailed technical description of which we have no objection to giving you in a coming report (if you are interested), has a TITANIUM memory capable of decoding a whole complex series of stored programmes with the instructions for automatically preparing what you call Dishes or Stews.
In principle the appliance could carry out all the operations without the help of the operator. The TITANIUM memory dictates a series of routines and subroutines (Put thus in the earthly jargon of computers).
Request from the YAA (TUBULAR STORE DESCRIBED) a NUUGII of OOGIXUAA MEAT (A MUCH-PRIZED REPTILE WITH WHITE MEAT).
Remove the protective jelly with liquid Oxygen.
Subject the meat to a toxin-removal treatment.
Macerate the meat or cut it into pieces (as the programme determines).
Season the whole with WUUNUA (Tonic seasoning).
Add IDIA OIXII (fatty milk of (FLYING MAMMAL).
